Love of a Knight
by Advi
Summary: Diarmuid Ua Duibhne... betrayed and sinking into darkness hears a mysterious woman calling his name. Who is this who dares disturb his descend into the deepest pit in hell?


Disclaimer: I, Advi, do not own Fate/Zero and all characters related to this series. All names and characters belong to Type-Moon and Kinoko Nasu.

**Love of a Knight**

A FATE/ZERO Fanfic

A Diarmuid Ua Duibhne (Lancer) & Arturia Pendragon (Saber)

Fanfiction

By Advi

Darkness…

Darkness…

A pit of endless darkness…

There he had his revenge; Diarmuid did as he promised to his master and fiancée. They were not given any mercy. They would pay for the treachery he endured, the bitterness that he, Diarmuid, tasted in the final moments of his second life. The betrayal of a callous master, a master that never understood him, never comprehended the code of honor of a loyal knight. And his master's fiancée who lusted after him, desired him; she who turned his master against him through jealousy.

They made him suffer agony he never experienced in his first life. In his first life he could never hate Grainne, or his lord. He forgave them… plus he truly came to love Grainne. But, Diarmuid could not forgive Kayneth Archibald El-Melloi and his fiancée, Sola Ui Nuada-Re Sophia-Ri.

In hell, Diarmuid waited and to his satisfaction he did not have to wait very long. The madness of his rage was still fresh when to his satisfaction they joined him. There he showed the couple what hell truly was. He was no longer the dutiful and obedient Diarmuid; he was now a vengeful demon. He attacked their hapless souls in frenzy. His blood drenched red spear ripping through the fabric of their souls.

Kayneth's and Sola's screams of pain and agony fell on deaf ears. Kayneth begged Diarmuid to stop, he tried to apologize; however, his former servant did not heed him.

Diarmuid was now more demon than an honorable heroic spirit. He relentlessly tortured their souls till he became bored and hollow within. He finally halted his attacks on them and went away, where to, he did not know. He was now clothed in black, his once beautiful light brown eyes, a ghastly shade of red.

There was only emptiness within him. His hatred and anger had left him, replaced instead by a void. He would also attack any spirit that came near to him. He was a lost soul, a soul that became poisoned by his own negative feelings.

Slowly, through the course of time's slow ticking pace, Diarmuid drifted into darkness, into a part of hell where there was nothing but darkness. Nothing else existed, not even other demons. He sunk into nothingness, stared blankly into darkness with his lifeless light brown eyes. The blood-red ones disappeared long ago with his anger.

There was nothing to feel within the darkness, there was no anger, no hate, no love, no suffering; there was nothing and nothing else existed there but him.

"Lancer…" a woman's voice softly called out.

"Lan…cer…?" he asked. That title sounded somewhat familiar. Where had he known it? But, that was not his name.

"Lancer," the woman's voice called again. Her voice felt familiar to him. It was sweet yet strong. Where had he heard this woman's voice before? Diarmuid could not remember.

"Go away," he finally answered. He wished to be alone. He desired no company. All Diarmuid wanted was to be alone in this comfortable darkness.

"Diarmuid Ua Duibhne, first of the knights of Fianna," said the woman's voice again, this time calling him by his true name. Diarmuid woke up. Who was this? Who was she? How did she know his real name and the title?

"Who are you? What do you want?" He demanded.

A beam of bright light shone suddenly through the darkness. Diarmuid shut his eyes.

The white light was intense; it hurt him as he was pierced by its dazzling brilliance.

"Diarmuid…" the female voice called out again, but this time it sounded closer.

He cracked open his eyelids and brilliant white light blinded him instantly. He immediately shut his eyes. "Get away from me!" he shouted, waving his right hand in front of him. He felt a small hand grip his wrist. Diarmuid cursed himself inwardly. What was he so afraid of? He had killed many and tortured his previous master. He will kill this person who dared wake him from his dark slumber.

He forced his eyes open and the first thing he saw was golden hair. Then, he felt something soft fall to his middle and down to his legs. Diarmuid looked down and found himself gazing into bright green eyes. These eyes… he knew them.

"Diarmuid…" her lips uttered his name.

He felt himself longing for her. But, suddenly, anger consumed him.

Diarmuid's light brown eyes turned blood-red, as he growled, enraged, "YOU!"

Strangely, she smiled kindly at him. "You still remember me."

His voice changed, it was raspier, deeper and filled with anger. It was much unlike his usual voice. "YOU WERE THERE AT MY DEATH! YOU WITNESSED MY BETRAYAL YET THERE WAS NO SYMPATHY FROM YOU! WERE YOU THAT GLAD AT MY DEATH! WHAT HONOR DO YOU HAVE IF YOU REJOICE AT YOUR ENEMY'S END!"

Though Diarmuid's right wrist was still in her grip, he forced it against the golden-haired woman, attempting to push her away. But, Diarmuid could not budge her. She tightened her grip on his wrist, holding him back.

He gazed hatefully her, blood spilling from his red eyes. "ARTURIA PENDRAGON, YOU HAVE MADE YOUR LAST MISTAKE IN MEETING ME IN HELL!"

Diarmuid attempted to strike Arturia with his left hand, but she caught it too. He stared furiously at her, while she held both of his hands away, gazing sadly at him. "Did you really want me to display my emotions in that situation?" she asked, calmly.

He shouted at her in reply, "YOU WERE MY ONLY SALVATION IN THAT DETESTABLE WAR! MY ONLY SOURCE OF HONOR WHEN EVERYTHING FAILED ME! EVEN MY MASTER SAW ME AS A WORTHLESS FAILURE, A FLIRT WHOSE ONLY GOAL IN LIFE IS TO STEAL HIS MASTER'S WIFE!"

All of a sudden, Arturia released his hands and wrapped her arms around his chest and pressed herself close to his person. "I'm so sorry that such things happened to you."

Surprise seemed to flash across his features, but then, he returned to shouting. "YOUR APOLOGIES MEAN NOTHING TO ME!"

Arturia nestled her head against his chest, saying, "To suffer the same fate even in your second life… no wonder you're consumed by grief."

"L~eave m~e!" he growled, almost animal-like.

"No, I won't leave you, Diarmuid," Arturia answered calmly, nestling her head against his firm muscular chest. "Even though at the scene of your death, when you had to take your own life, I remained almost emotionless…"

"LET GO OF ME!" he shouted, but she remained by his person, her arms wrapped around his middle.

"My role of a King has made me numb to the scene of a bold knight's death," Arturia continued as he fought to escape her grip. "In my life, I saw the deaths of many good knights, many of them my dearest friends, people I knew for years… members of my family…" sorrow echoed in her voice, as Arturia recalled the death of Gawain and the death of Mordred and the fall of her country. Diarmuid stopped struggling against her, the sadness in her voice managed to crack the shell of anger he had created at his death.

"Having watched so many deaths in my life… it helped to mask my true feelings of watching you take your life," her grip around him tightened. "Of knowing that the only reason for your death was the spell casted by your master… the usage of… the…command seal…" she buried her face into his chest. Arturia could not continue.

There was silence between them. Arturia clung tightly to Diarmuid though he was no longer fighting against her, as they floated in the never-ending pit of darkness. His eyes slowly returned to their mesmerizing shade of light brown with a hint of gold.

Slowly, he asked, "Were you really… that affected… by my death?"

"How can I not be?" she answered, softly. "You were my enemy in that war… but you acted with full honor and nobility. Never once did you act with disrespect. You saved me countless times and you even sacrificed one of your prized weapons for me and you were my equal in battle… how could I not be sorrowed at the way you died? You should have died in battle at the hands of your foe, in honorable combat as a knight. Not by taking your own life because of a command that none of us heroic spirits could disobey. This is why I have searched for you."

He finally gazed down with his normal eyes at the beautiful golden-haired woman. "Searching for me, why?" Diarmuid asked; his voice back to its normal sound.

Arturia smiled serenely at him. The sight of her smile sent warmth through his anguish ridden and tormented soul. Then, she began to glow golden as small orbs of gold began to materialize around them. They reminded him of fireflies, especially how they floated idly around them. Arturia moved away from him. The loss of her body's heat suddenly pained Diarmuid. He did not understand why he had such a strong urge to keep the beautiful golden-haired woman close to him.

He held his hand up, as if wanting to pull her back. But, Diarmuid stopped, as he watched, spellbound, by the buoyant golden orbs filling the dark, dense, black pit. Then, he heard beautiful angelic voices singing, lifting the sorrow, pain and anger from his soul, freeing him from the invisible chains that were pulling the tall and handsome man deeper into the darkness.

Arturia held her hands up before her; the golden orbs raced to her opened palms. Diarmuid watched, as they took the form of something stick-like. Then, with a bright flash, a short golden spear formed in her hands.

"Gae Buidhe," said Diarmuid, surprised to see his old spear, the spear he sacrificed to save the people of Fuyuki from Caster's monster, the spear he broke to free Arturia from its spell. "I broke this spear… it disappeared from existence… how?"

Arturia beamed at him. Diarmuid knew that if he still possessed a heart, it would flutter at such a lovely smile. "This is something I've been meaning to return to you. You made a bold sacrifice for me and as a King I cannot forget it, even as a spirit. By my grace and honor and by my title, King of Knights… this is a something that I can do. Here…" she said, allowing the golden spear to float to him.

The moment his right hand caught Gae Buidhe, a long red spear, Gae Dearg appeared in his left hand. Grasping both his spears, Diarmuid felt like his old self again. "I… feel like how I used to… before…" he whispered, gazing at the red and golden spears.

"I'm glad," Arturia replied, pleased.

His light brown-yellowish eyes meet hers; finally, his gaze was kind. "Even in death, you are my salvation," said Diarmuid. "You truly are a King of Knights. I was lost in sorrow, mad with anger, drowning in despair… yet… you pulled me out of that. You saved me from eternal madness… how can I ever repay you?"

Arturia reached out and cupped his cheek, gazing into his eyes, she answered, "Be yourself."

"Arturia…" he uttered her name tenderly. Then with his spears still in his hands, Diarmuid wrapped his arms around Arturia's petite frame and pulled her close. Her soft golden tresses caressed his arms as he held her in a firm, but loving embrace. He finally realized it… he was in love with Arturia. "Thank you," he spoke softly, his voice filled with love for the majestic woman in blue. "You have saved my soul… Arturia Pendragon…"

Arturia hugged him back, feeling his muscles under his body hugging green outfit. "Diarmuid… among all the knights I have ever met… you are the person who understands me the most… I had to save you. I needed to save you… I did not want you to wither away by the emotions that overcame you in death. You deserved better."

As they continued to hold on to each other, Diarmuid tightened his grip on the petite blond. He now considered Arturia the most beautiful woman he had ever come across. How he envied the man who loved her in her life. Feeling himself melting into her small frame, he said, "If fate would ever be kind to me… I wish to live again and to be by your side. I wish that I could have known you in life… Arturia…"

"No, don't wish that," she replied, her grip on him loosened, "if you knew me in life… you would not love me… you would see me as a King and a man. Only one of my knights knew I was a woman… and… … he… … my life was filled with battles, I constantly fought for my people to make their lives better. If you were to live in my time… you would not know me," she answered, sadly.

"No," Diarmuid began in a deep and gentle tone of voice. "A man will never forget the woman he loves." Arturia felt stunned by his words. Blushing, she tilted her head to see him say, "How cruel fate is to me," he said gently, "to meet the only women to not fall in love with me because of this love spot… to love her as a spirit… to only meet you in death. I've waited for you the entire length of my existence. So, no, I will know you and I will love you as a man loves a woman. Even if it feels as if we met upon a dream, I will know you, Arturia."

Tears of happiness welled in Arturia's bright green eyes. "Diarmuid…" she had strength to utter only his name.

He bent low towards her, their foreheads touching the other, or in his case, his forehead pressed gently against her golden bangs. She raised her hands and lovingly touched his cheeks.

"Can this be possible?" she asked. Experiencing the love of a man was something that was impossible in her life.

The darkness around them began to fade, as light slowly appeared in patches of white and sky blue around the couple.

"Yes, it is," Diarmuid answered, tenderly. "Did you always think that it was impossible to be loved?"

"Yes…" Arturia answered solemnly, "When I was alive, I had to pretend to be a man. I knew I could no longer be a woman when I pulled Caliburn from the stone. I sacrificed myself, my womanhood… everything for my people, for my country."

"No longer," said Diarmuid, tenderly. He placed the golden Gae Buidhe in his left hand with Gae Dearg and raised his right hand and cupped her cheek. Shyly, Arturia lifted her green eyes to his light brown ones. "Here with me, you are a woman. You are not Arthur, but Arturia…"

She smiled happily at him. Diarmuid lowered his face closer to hers. Her eyelids fell in anticipation. His nose brushed against hers, as their lips touched. But, suddenly Arturia was pulled out of his arms.

He looked up and saw her engulfed in a ray of white light as her armor materialized. She looked up as her golden hair was brushed into a bun. "I'm being summoned."

"Another war?" Diarmuid asked, gazing at the radiant woman in a blue and white gown with silver armor.

"Yes, another Holy Grail War has begun," Arturia answered. She looked down at the handsome and striking Diarmuid. His long black hair, swept back with a lock of it hanging down his face. He looked sadly at her, but then, he smiled.

"Good luck, Arturia. May you be victorious," he said.

"Thank you," she answered, "this time, I won't make the same mistakes I did in the previous war." She rose away from him, higher and higher into the light and then finally disappearing with it.

Diarmuid landed softly on a never-ending green grassy field. Staring at the blue spirit sky decked with white puffy clouds, he still burned with love he had for Arturia, his beloved King of Knights. "I wish you not just victory, Arturia… but, I wish that you will learn to love and be loved. To be treated as a woman, to know what it is like to be cherished."

He closed his eyes and gripping his spears, the red Gae Dearg in his left hand and the golden Gae Buidhe in his right, he said, "Fate… please, just this once, look kindly on me. For once, please grant me happiness. Please hear my wish and I beg you, allow me to be by her side. Please allow me to love her. Even if I have to traverse over a thousand years to find her, to fight a hundred battles before I can reach her, let me meet Arturia Pendragon again. Please allow me to meet her and love her. Please… please… I want to love her. Grant me this wish, please…"

Then, he heard a soft voice in the wind answer, "Diarmuid Ua Duibhne, your wish is granted."

Smiling, Diarmuid answered, "Thank you."

Slowly, he dematerialized with his mythical Irish spears and all that was left in the green grassy endless field was his voice, saying, "I love you, Arturia…"

The End.

Edited and updated on June 06-06-2012 to change a repeated sentence.

Thank you everyone for your reviews.


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